Monthly Archives: April 2013
Three days short of being a full month from the date of the accident, I called my new lender to let them know that the insurance pay0ff had gone through. When I got through to my contact, I was greeted with the words, “Oh yes, your loan funded this morning.”
So ended a month of wondering when the next call from the lender would come and what the requirements would be for me this time. So ended a month of wondering how long the process would take and whether or not I’d be car and loan hunting again soon.
So ended the last of my March and the first of my April. A small blemish in my otherwise wonderful year.
This morning, right in the middle of my first client meeting I get this text from the finance guy at my dealership:
Good Morning. You need to call Your New Lender today to do a three-way call with Your Old Lender. You have to call today or they will decline your loan and potentially return the car.
He left me a number to call.
“Really???” I thought to myself. “I thought this was settled long ago.”
Vacations are supposed to be relaxing. They are supposed to provide a way of escaping the day-to-day dilemmas and disasters. They are supposed to provide us with an opportunity to slow things down, to get done those things we want to do but which we often don’t have the time to do, they are supposed to provide us time to relax, to recreate, to even escape our realities in some way, if need be. At least, this is true in theory.
They started again. The moving dreams. They are all similar, some of them even repeat certain elements while varying others. Each time they occur they tend to signal some sort of transition, either one I’m going through, one I’m considering, or one I’m completely unaware that is happening or soon to occur. I had no memory of this dream upon waking this morning. It came back to me, in full detail much later in the day, as I was sitting in traffic, of all places. It was so surreal, I was tempted to close my eyes and relive the dream.
I’m angry with my cats right now. I have four of them. I am pretty frustrated with one of them in particular. This cat is obnoxious. Every night after midnight, until about 3:00 a.m., he decides to get active. It’s as though someone injected a high dose of stimulants into his bloodstream. It’s making me crazy and depriving me of sleep…a lot of sleep…for a long time now.
My mother used to say some things that were interesting when she told them to me as a child, but now, after her passing nearly a decade ago, I find them to be perceptive beyond belief. One of her favorite axioms was, “Most of life is boring.” She would usually say this in response to one of us kids declaring our boredom. She was unphased. “It’s life,” she’d say. “Only boring people get bored. Learn to entertain yourself, instead of relying on others to do it for you.”
My mother was right. So much of life is wash, rinse, repeat.
I get up, drag myself out of bed, and fumble my way to the shower. I go through my days doing mostly stuff that pertains to making sure my kids and I have a roof over our heads, food in the fridge, electricity and heat, and a vehicle to get us to and fro. My weekend activities don’t vary much. I’m a bit of a cyclist and spend lots of time out on my bike. I tend to go to the same places to eat and socialize. I have fun, but it isn’t a constantly changing menu of activities and events.
Today, or rather, yesterday, I got up and decided I would drive my fancy new-to-me car to a small trendy town nearby and have breakfast at a lovely little place that is always packed and has delicious, melt-in-your-mouth menu items. I went alone. I usually go alone. I like to go alone. I’m really okay with this most of the time, but lately, maybe due to the car wreck with my kid, maybe due to the fact that everyone else around me seems to be having success in the relational field, maybe because I’m just tired of being alone all.the.time. Most of the time I don’t mind being alone, but lately I’ve stopped going out and doing things, because I was getting tired of doing the alone thing. Today, I didn’t care. I wanted to have breakfast at a nice place. I wanted to drive in my car. I didn’t necessarily want to have to be responsible for holding up my end of a conversation, but I somehow, strangely wanted to immerse myself in a crowd of people and noise, and fragrances and life. So, I went out to breakfast.