Happy Valentine’s aka. Singles Awareness Day

Red and pink balloons, chocolates in heart shapes with red, pink, silver, and gold foil wrapping, cards, dinners…disgusting. Valentine’s Day is a day of obligation. It’s a day of duty. It’s a day of, “If you don’t get her something, your proverbial goose is cooked.” It’s a day I’ve never enjoyed, no matter my relationship status. It always seemed, when I was in a relationship, that the men I was with were anxious about the day. Or they forgot. Or they simply didn’t know what to do. Or worse…and this did happen…they didn’t care and they did nothing.

Yes, Valentine’s Day, to me, is contrived. It’s a holiday designed to succeed from the guilt of others who somehow feel that they need to jump through certain hoops in order to be viewed as loving, loyal, acceptable, or romantic. What happened to authenticity?

Then there is the problem of faking it for a day. Okay, so you’re nice to your gal on Valentine’s but you beat the shit out of her emotionally, financially, or maybe even physically all the rest of the days of the year. Truthfully, I think if you just started treating her with respect the other days of the year, she wouldn’t even care that you didn’t have the most elaborate and/or expensive gift for Valentine’s. Relationship is about what you do, not what you say you will do, or what you promise you will do or what you hope to do. Everyone sees through the insincerity. I saw through it every time, but I foolishly made light of it, because, of course, who can legitimately admit unhappiness on this day?

All of this just underscores for me how much better the single life is than a bad relationship.

So, today, I am celebrating. I am celebrating my growth over the last six years since my divorce. I am celebrating all the challenges I’ve faced and overcome. I’m celebrating the fact that I’ve made it on my own. I’m single, yet I’m happier than I’ve ever been since graduating from college. I also have more love and hope in my life than ever before.

I’m renaming the day. I’m calling it Singles Awareness Day. I’m single, but I’m not unhappy about this. I enjoy the company I keep when I’m alone. I love the people I’m with when I’m not alone. I don’t need a date or “a relationship” to complete me.

It’s Singles Awareness Day, and I am anything but SAD.

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