Hypocrisy

I am a freaking hypocrite.

I said I didn’t want to date anymore. I meant it. I really did. What am I saying? I still mean it. I do so love my independence and my life right now.

Best intentions have flown out the window. Innocently, though it was. I didn’t intend to get a date out of the interaction. I made a simple comment on Facebook, in response to a comment that resonated with me.

Next thing you know, we’re meeting up to listen to a local live musician we both know.

We’ve known each other for, at least, a year.
We’ve never met face to face…until last Saturday evening.

And, now…we have a “date” for this coming Saturday evening.

A date, he started arranging last Sunday/Monday evening. A date that includes dinner at a very nice Italian restaurant in a nearby trendy town that I just love. A date. Yeah…a date. It is still a date and I’m not sure how I feel about that.

He’s going to pick me up. He’ll foot the tab, I already know this. He’ll drive me home at a reasonable hour and will be the perfect gentleman. Further, he’ll be a wonderfully brilliant and intelligent conversationalist. He’ll ask me out again. I already know how the first part of this is going to go.

I’m scared to death.

I’m not sure I’m ready for this. What’s more, I think he understands that…and well…I have no idea what’s going on here, but I know this: we connect…in a way I don’t think I’ve ever connected with anyone. He “gets” me. If I’m not ready for anything, I think he’ll “get” that too. Plus, he loves his independence too, so he understands that piece of me. This is a great guy. I’ve known this for over a year. And, my wanting to meet him never had any hint of romance intended or considered. I simply wanted to get to know in person, this wonderfully sensitive and creative soul I knew in digital form, and when the opportunity arose, I simply agreed. Nothing more. Nothing less.

But a simple meetup turned into dinner and a night of fantastic blues music. But, since he was the pianist, and since it was only a casual meet up, we both went our separate ways afterward. But..he was sure to ask if he could call, and he’s emailed me every single night, sometimes twice…and not in a needy weird way either.

This is a real human being.

This is an intellient, thoughtful, considerate, and creative individual.

It’s strange how very at easy I feel with him…and yet…because I feel so at ease…I am nervous.

This is going to be very, very interesting.

In the meantime, I’m planning to have a great time this weekend.

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About Miz Insomniac

Usually, it's the kids who grow up and leave home, but Miz Insomniac switched it up. When her kids grew up she decided to make her dreams come true so she flew the nest. After making 12 trips across the pond and back to Europe, Eastern Europe, and the Middle East in 2014-15, Miz Insomniac now qualifies as a world traveler. She hasn't quite mastered the fine art of traveling light, but she knows how to manipulate travel plans to avoid missed flights and jet lag. A former hopeless romantic turned realist, she's stateside now reinventing her life in a new city, with new opportunities, and all the challenges that come with leaving a career, traveling abroad for a year, and then returning to a world that's nothing like she left it. Her overseas travel is by no means over, it's just not as frequent. She's different now, but remains a night owl. She writes when she should be sleeping...and while you probably are.

Posted on February 7, 2013, in Dating and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

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