Frustrations

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Ever notice how you can be sailing along in life and then, somehow, the silliest little thing trips you up? This is me tonight. Tripped up over the silliest little thing. Life is great. I’m making it through what has traditionally been the worst month of the year for me financially with money in the bank (not much, but it’s progress). I’ve got several new adventures coming up and I’m not swinging from one disaster to the next like I did the last five years of my life. So, you ask, what could the problem be now?

The problem is that I own a PC. And lately, it has been quite the temperamental PC. The current problem is that Windows won’t start up. I run startup repair and it sticks somewhere along the line. I hate this kind of crap. I love technology, most of the time. However, I could never be a programmer, because I hate dealing with the bugs. I just don’t like to be inconvenienced.

I’m spoiled. I know. I usually have things working so smoothly, that when they don’t, it really frustrates me. I try to keep on top of the stuff in order to prevent problems like this, so when they happen, I am doubly frustrated. It could be worse.

It could be a flat tire when I’m out riding 15 miles away from home and I have no one to call to help me out. (I need to learn to change my flats.)
It could be boyfriend moving out and out of state with no notice.
It could be a child totaling the only family car.
It could be cancer or radiation treatments.
Or…
It could be…as in the case of at least two families in my sphere of connection…death of a child.

This week has been one of crazy freezing fog. We often get fog in the winter. We don’t often get temperatures this cold, for this long. Lately, the travel conditions, especially at night, have been downright scary.

I came home from work Wednesday, early. I wasn’t feeling well, but really didn’t want to have to call in sick. I needed a nap. I gave my 19-year-old the keys to the car and asked her to take the 12-year-old to Volleyball practice. My 19-year-old loves to drive, and she’s a safe driver, but she is also the child that totaled our family car. Sure, all’s well that ends well, but still. I am her mother. I worry. I wasn’t particularly worried about the transportation to volleyball practice. It was early enough in the day that the fog wouldn’t be creeping in until later and it wasn’t far from the house. The problem was, the daughter was pressuring me to let her drive the car to her theatre practice that night, after volleyball practice, in the fog, on icy roads, a 20-30 minute drive. I wasn’t okay with this. Especially not when there were travel advisories out.

Fortunately, the fog was bad enough on the way back from volleyball practice that it spooked my daughter. “That was the scariest thing I’ve ever done. I am not driving in that and I am not going to practice tonight.” Of course, I was relieved. I was saddened by what happened next.

My daughter sat down to check her Facebook on her phone. I’ll never forget her words, “I haven’t been on Facebook all day, and I come home after driving though that fog and ice, and after deciding not to go to rehearsal, only to learn on Facebook that one of my friends from high school died this morning when her car hit a patch of ice and went off the road.”

We are grieved to hear this. Though I don’t know this girl or her family, my daughter did. My frustrations pale in comparison to the loss they are dealing with. This has hit us hard. For me, as a mother, I can only imagine the pain this family is going through. My daughter is having a hard time too. She doesn’t say it, but I see it. It’s been a tough week. Sometimes, it’s difficult to be a mom for your adult child.

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About Miz Insomniac

Usually, it's the kids who grow up and leave home, but Miz Insomniac switched it up. When her kids grew up she decided to make her dreams come true so she flew the nest. After making 12 trips across the pond and back to Europe, Eastern Europe, and the Middle East in 2014-15, Miz Insomniac now qualifies as a world traveler. She hasn't quite mastered the fine art of traveling light, but she knows how to manipulate travel plans to avoid missed flights and jet lag. A former hopeless romantic turned realist, she's stateside now reinventing her life in a new city, with new opportunities, and all the challenges that come with leaving a career, traveling abroad for a year, and then returning to a world that's nothing like she left it. Her overseas travel is by no means over, it's just not as frequent. She's different now, but remains a night owl. She writes when she should be sleeping...and while you probably are.

Posted on January 20, 2013, in Wrapping My Mind Around These Things...Or Trying To and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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